Procrastination Is Not A Character Flaw

Read that title again.

Read that title out loud.

Got it? Okay. Now we can talk about what procrastination really is!

If you procrastinate, a little or a lot, you need to know is that it’s not related to who you are and it doesn’t indicate anything that is “wrong” with you! Procrastination, “the act of delaying or postponing tasks or decisions”, is a coping mechanism. A signal, if you will, of something in your brain telling you to pay attention to the mental and emotional processes more than the thing you are putting off.

Too many times, when we realize we are putting something off until later, we use it as a negative judgement of our personality and identity. That judgement reinforces our underlying fear of failure, of judgement from others, our perfectionism, our confusion (and/or lack of understanding of what is needed), fatigue and, potentially, executive dysfunction.

Bottom line? That judgement has no basis in fact and it prolongs the process because it keeps us focused on the wrong thing. Most of the time, when we procrastinate, it’s our brain working to refocus our attention so that we can find a solution for the actual problem. The habit of procrastination is a sign that you are stuck, not that you are incapable.

What does procrastination sound like?

Like so many things, procrastination is not always a conscious choice. For many, it has become an automatic coping response and we do it without thinking. So, it might sound like a constant voice saying, “I’ll do ___________ after I do ___________ .” (something else that you haven’t started). It might be the thought that you can’t start ______________ until you have more information. Sometimes, it sounds like you telling yourself that you work better under pressure. Or, it sounds like you wanting to wait to start until you think you have enough time to finish it “perfectly”, knowing that there will never be enough time for that.

How do I recognize the root of my procrastination?

Have you ever bought a new car then, suddenly, start noticing them everywhere? More than likely, there are not massively increased numbers of the make and model of the car you are now driving on the road. So, what has changed? You’re just more aware of them.

Recognizing procrastination is like that. You have to start noticing it more when it happens to you. Instead of immediately distracting yourself when you feel your brain giving you the signal that you are stuck, you have to pause and notice what is going on in that moment.

Are you overwhelmed?

Are you mentally and/or physically exhausted?

Are you worried about failing?

Are you setting an impossible standard?

Once you are honest about what is going on mentally, emotionally, and physically while you are stuck, you can address that thing, the REAL issue and proceed with completing the task. Trust me, completing the task is usually much easier than understanding what is happening in your mind!

That said, understand that there is a learning curve for recognizing procrastination. It’s going to feel awkward and silly at first. But, I promise, the more you practice, the better you will get. And the better you get at recognizing what your brain is trying to tell you in those moments, the less you will find yourself putting things off.

Can I stop procrastinating completely?

I believe you can, not because you complete some process, but because your awareness of the habit and your willingness to change it will make a difference. Once you decide you want to stop doing it, you will pay closer attention. Once you pay closer attention to when you do it, you’ll start processing the real emotions that cause it. Then, you’ll realize that you don’t need a coping mechanism as often because you have focused your attention on the right thing at the right time.

If you continue to do the work, at some point, I believe you will stop and try to remember the last time you put something off…and you won’t be able to remember it. That’s when you’ll know you, in the words of one of my clients, “don’t do that anymore.” I don’t know if that process will be a long one or a short one for you, but I know that moment will change everything from that point on.

Is it hard work? Yes!

Is it worth it? Absolutely! More than you can ever imagine.

I hope you’ll find that freedom. But, even if you never do anything more than accept procrastination as a signal AND NOT A FLAW, it will change you for the better.

Read that title again.